Shopping

This has nothing to do with Christmas shopping, it’s just an overall observation by someone who would rather undergo a root-canal than take a trip to Walmart.

Don’t get me wrong, there are times when you just HAVE to buy things and can’t get out of it. Knowing what you need and getting it is vastly different than just cruising the isles looking for inspiration. Find what you know you need and get out!

I’d never be able to wander the halls of some shopping mall wondering what I was going to get for someone (or even myself) for hours on end, or even a few minutes. The same goes for picking up every shirt on a rack to gaze at it, even though they are all the same color and pattern, and often all the same size. Never have understood that!

If I AM forced to “help”, I usually get a cart and lean on it, mind wandering, until someone has to come back and get me where I stand. Never fails, she goes through the narrowest opening in racks, or passes some “plus, plus size” shopper and I have to backtrack three or four isles, inevitably being ‘lost’ for many minutes after that detour.

Lots of times I just “park” with my cart, trying to find somewhere out of the way. It NEVER fails that wherever I am, someone wants what’s right behind me. I swear, if I was standing in front of a display with this sign

PETRIFIED HUMAN FECES

$2,000 / oz

someone would want to shop for that! I’ve even LOOKED for the Petrified Human Feces display to park my cart – all in vain.

Oh, and by the way, it’s a CART! A “buggy” is what you put a baby in!